Dear Diary: Over thinking and faking happiness

Sometimes I really dislike the fact that I am an over thinker, notice I didn’t say hate. Over thinking  for me leads to anxiety which leads to stress which leads to a total hot mess… sometimes. What’s worse is when people or even your ‘good friend’ makes fun of you in your situation.

I like to think that sometimes my over thinking benefits me in situations where people don’t see things coming or haven’t thought about the consequences of their actions and that’s when the people that make fun of you are like okay, well you’re over thinking came in handy. I don’t know what it is but I am feeling quite disconnected from a friend of mine lately, I thought maybe if I just gave it some space and time for me to get things sorted in my head, it’ll all be okay, but I really think this friendship is coming to an end.

Is it the fact that as we grow older, we change.. our views, our perspectives, our overall outlook on life? Or could it even be the people we hang around with, the influences, the peer pressure and just changing in general that you now know you and your friend have nothing in common anymore. I’ve honestly just felt so torn and confused as to why these things are happening, everything this particular person says to me is like they’re trying to tear me apart and make me feel horrible about myself and taking stabs at me and playing on my weaknesses AND to anybody who has a ‘friend’  like that, they are NOT your friend! 

It’s so weird how things turn out, when you’re little, you think you’ll be best friends forever and nothing, NOTHING will tear you guys apart, but things change and we change and we make new friends I suppose. I just really hope that I’m the unfortunate one that has this issue because nobody should ever make you feel bad about yourself. Oh and trust me the situation is being handled as we speak and let me know what you guys think of this deep and meaningful post and until next time..

Byee!

xx

P.S Check out what I had for dinner a few nights ago on Instagram here.

P.P.S Tweet me some of your thoughts on Twitter here. 

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